We're adopting and would like to share our decision by emailing family and friends. Where can I go for ideas?

Perhaps they know someone that is pregnant and can't keep the child.


Either way we would like to share the great news with friends and family.


Since I am not a great writer I need some ideas on how to put that special email together.


Thanks
We're adopting and would like to share our decision by emailing family and friends. Where can I go for ideas?
If you're asking if you should email family and friends that you have decided to adopt so they can search for an unwanted baby for you, it's really a bad idea for several reasons:





- if you get a baby that way and don't use a lawyer, you might well end up with the birth parent(s) coming back later to take the baby.





- if you find a pregnant mother online and support her to get her baby, you may find up you're just another victim of a con artist. This is a common con... get a bunch of desperate people to give you money and some of these girls aren't really even pregnant.





- you're not sharing your joy that you're about to adopt, you're desperately betting them to find you a baby, which they'll find offensive.





Go to a lawyer or an adoption agency and adopt and you can email your family and friends when you have a commitment that is REAL that a baby is coming into your life soon.


cw
Reply:How about





Hi all,


Just thought we'd drop a line to you all, GUESS WHAT we've decided that we're gonna adopt a baby ! Yeah woo hoo and we'd like you to be a part of it by putting out your feelers, and hell why not some wanted ads for us , I mean everyones *doing it* we'd really appreciate you helping us acquire a child...Perhaps you could all come together and do a whip around at the same time, because adoption is bluddy expensive ...Just in case one of you cant pressure any of your unwed young friends that may have recently got pregnant to hand over their child to us...


We're excited , aren't you ? Thanks for being a part of us *acquiring* a baby "





Signed


*I'm unbelievable that I would try and gain a baby by email"
Reply:Wow. Uh. Um. Just...wow. Yuck!





I think the earlier answers explained why this is so WRONG. If you were adopting through foster care, and just wanted to send out an announcement, "hey everybody, we're adding to our family! Please be respectful, and allow us to introduce our children as they become more comfortable with our family. We'll all need a few months to adjust, so don't take it personally if you don't see us much," that would be WAAAAAAAY different.





Sending out an email to solicit for a kid is just sick and wrong. Please do some research on the effect adoption has on adoptees (especially when it's all about you and your desire to acquire a baby, and not an effort to provide a family to a child who needs one) before jumping into this. You've obviously got some serious misconceptions about what adoption is. Adoption should be a way to provide a FAMILY for a child who NEEDS one, not a way to fill your desires. Children shouldn't come into this world with a job (i.e. filling your desires).
Reply:Kim, I am confused as to your question. Are you asking how to tell your family and friends, an email or letter explaining your decision Kinda like a shower invite thing so they know what is going on before the baby or child arrives?





Or are you asking them to keep their ears open for any children that are going to be placed for adoption?
Reply:Like the other answerers, I would recommend going through an adoption agency, but for simply breaking the news, try something like, 'X (husband/partners name) and myself have decided to open our hearts to a child that needs a home. We are adopting. Please feel free to ask anything and we welcome you to be involved in this special time.'
Reply:*bangs head on desk*





Be subtle here, don't go around asking people to help secure you a child. That would just be tacky-tack-tack.





Save the mass email for when you actually become parents. I know I would feel awkward getting an email announcing that an old friend is planning on adoption, hopefully, someday, in the future.
Reply:e-mailing friends and family is not a good thing I was adopted and I knwo for sure my family did not do that at all they talked to them face to face and some family didn't agree and some did I would talk to them but all in all it is your decision to open your hearts and homes to a cihld in need is what is important to you then stand your ground! wish you luck and thanks to you more of us get adopted
Reply:don't use email to adopt a child- go to an adoption agency, foster care, or an adoption attorney.
Reply:normal people do not "EMAIL" for babies. they go through foster care.
Reply:If i may put this in another perspective for you......





Would you send out an email if you were planning on having a biological child? How would you word that?





"Hi everyone, just wanted to let you know that "Bob" and i have decided to have a biological child. I've gone off the pill and he's now wearing boxers and not taking hot showers. Please do not call or stop by while i'm ovulating as we will be busy doing adult things.





Would you send out a monthly reminder of when you're ovulating?





I'd hope not. So why would you want to announce your plans of adoption this way? Trust me when i say no one wants to hear of your family building plans until it's time to congratulate.





Close family members and friends should know of your wishes already. They shouldn't need an email reminder of how you plan on building your family.





As for asking them to check around and let you know if anyone might want to place their child with you, that's just not a good idea. No matter if someone else has instructed you to do so.





My suggestion. Sit down with your sig. other. Discuss and learn the different types of adoption. Figure out how to best go about it ethically and legally. This is going to require at least an attorney. Also check into foster care. You can be listed with them as only looking for adoption situations. You do not have to be an actual foster parent. These children need a stable loving home and often there is little to no cost for the process.





If you find foster care is not for you, then find an agency. Find one that ethically works with the mothers. It takes a great deal of education on your part and time in doing the research. Understand that the child is the other mother and father's child until they say you are to be the legal parents. But that they will always be a part of your child. This is about the child and you should always approach it with that understanding.





Sending out an email discussing your family building plans is not one i would advise. There is too much at stake for everyone involved for this to be started in a form type of email.





It seems you are just getting started in the process. So i'm not trying to sound rude. Just that you need to start somewhere else. This is something that will forever affect the mother, the child and you. Starting the process in a group mailed form letter is not the way to go about it.








Once the child has been legally placed with you, then go for it. Send out mailed and emailed announcements. Let everyone know of your new addition.
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